I Just Want to Quit
The hardest thing I've ever done in my life was fall and crawl on my knees. For the first time in my life I didn't fully break. I just kept moving forward. The amount of power, will and disclipine it takes to crawl forward is outstanding. When you fail at your dreams and realise it was just your fault alone there's nothing more upsetting. Your confidence is knocked so it's time to build yourself back up a brick at a time.
Especially after knowing you may have another chance in two weeks to try again. Everything is riding on you to keep your shit together, but most importantly growing. It would be too easy at this point to just go, "Meh, next year". Maybe it won't exist next year. How far can you really fall always?
Failing is part of the process so I guess I got to start welcoming it with open arms. Sorry it's not motivational, but this is true. This is where I am right now. It's not always motivating. However, you live and learn! Just crawl my friends. If I can, you can.